16 February 2005

Sit! Sit! Goddamnit I said SIT!

According to Thomas Stinson of the Atlanta Journal and Constitution (we in the ATL call it the AJC), a German Shorthaired Pointer won Best in Show at the 129th Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. There exists, perhaps, somewhere, a link to Mr Stinson's article, but I read the paper variety of the AJC. If you find the link, please let me know, and I'll update this for those who are interested.

In my experience, though limited, the GSP victory bodes ill. Before I get to that, however, let me call those Westminster folks out, right here, right up front. NONE of those dogs live in kennels. They only call it a kennel club because that's what they've been calling it for years. My grandfather had a dog named Trinka who looked a whole lot like the Canis Whoopedyourdoggiedogsbootiusminimus crowned by Westminster pupophiles, and that was the last dog I ever knew to actually call a kennel home. When she wasn't in a kennel, she was tromping the hills and dales of New Jersey (maybe New York and Pennsylvania as well) looking for things my grandfather needed to shoot. Now, my beautiful bride Celine is not one to tell tales (though she does tell a story about her cat that slew a dog) tells me that her folks had a GSP named Duke who enjoyed kennel digs and worked for a living. Celine's dad Sidney backs her up on this, and can discourse at length about Duke's innate abilities and cultivated skills that set him apart from his four footed friends better suited to round out a Pyonyang BBQ.

If you know nothing about GSPs, and you don't ever care to, never, never engage in a conversation with someone who has ever had one. However, if you enjoy the company of people who care passionately about things, and you feel that you have sufficient intellect to absorb the information contained in the Library of Congress every 2.718 seconds, then, by all means ask the gal with the dog with the liver spots "Is that a German Shorthaired Pointer?" If you're somewhere in between, let me distill some of the main GSP talking points. The dogs can be trained to do stuff that generally spans the abilities of different breeds. They can point and retrieve on land and in water. They are rugged, strong, and tolerant. The few that I've been around have not been aggressive toward other dogs.

So, these German Shorthaired Pointers sound like God gave the GSP the short end of the stick with the creation of Adam "Fetch my slippers!" Firstguydoesntneedalastname and Eve "BAD DOG!" Phallotheocraticpatriarchygoesbacktodayone. Were it that simple.

There is a story here, and I intend to tell it. However, I've got bread baking and I need to get cracking on the sauce I'm making for dinner. Dadgummint! If you know a blogger, please schmooch her. If you don't, please start one and let me know how it goes.

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